Sunday, 18 November 2012

Different versions of the same child...

Why is it that the Version of the child that we know is so different from the version they show everyone else?

What is it about parents that seem to bring out the worst in their child?

Of course we also get the absolute best bits as well, but there seems to be distinct personas that are brought out in certain situations.

As a teacher, I often get to see the good version. Perfect angels in the classroom get labelled as horrors by their parents. Why is that?

Recently at Alex's creche there was an "altercation" with another child and Alex was hurt. Immediately I asked if Alex did anything to the other child and the staff almost laughed at me. "Not Alex!" one said with a chuckle.

Really?? Don't they know my son and how nasty he can be? I guess he doesn't show that version of himself at crèche.

Here's my theory on the unconscious dialogue that goes through kids heads...

About the teacher:
"I think I know my teacher pretty well, I've tested out all the boundaries, but just in case, I'll do what I'm told and be good." (Of course there are always exceptions to this theory- in fact I can name several!!)

At home:
"I'm comfortable with Mum/Dad, they will love me no matter what so I can throw that tantrum and they will still love me tomorrow"

Makes sense right?

But I also know those kids who don't have a good home life and I really can't be sure if Mum/dad will love them no matter what. What about them?

They push the boundaries a bit further at school, and are generally a bit harder to deal with but most teachers can find a way around them. What is it that makes them want to be good for their teacher?

I can't figure that one out.

Thankfully Alex IS part of the "Mum/Dad will love me tomorrow not matter what he does" group, but I'm still crossing my fingers that he continues to only lets his inner demon out at home!


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